Two thoughts…..
People notice what they’ve done, but do not acknowledge when others do the same.
People notice what others do, but do not acknowledge when they do the same.
The first one I think can be regarded when people do something in consideration for others like sending thoughtful messages or doing things that makes someone else’s life a little more pleasing. In a domestic sense, we can even say doing household chores without being asked is something we notice when we do it, but do not very much acknowledge it when others do it. The second one could be regarded when people do things we don’t like, but we do not acknowledge it when we do things others do not like. For instance when we notice people being argumentative, but when we are doing the same we justify it as “trying to make a point”. It’s easier for us to point out what we do not like about others, but fail to notice our own flaws. I know we are all guilty of this.
None of us ever likes to admit our faults, but if we are expecting others to admit theirs shouldn’t we lead by example? Yet, then again this goes back to thought #1. It’s a human cycle of underlying selfishness that we don’t like to think about, but the reality is, we subconsciously want people to make us comfortable without always considering how to make others comfortable because that would mean making ourselves uncomfortable — and not everyone is willing to do that.
Just think on it, your relationships with others, how many of them were you willing to adjust your comfort levels for? Why? And did or do those people adjust their comfort levels for you or have you even noticed?
I have a bad habit of saying everything is fine when it’s not and I know I’m not the only one who does this. — This is me not wanting to ask people to make themselves uncomfortable in order to make me comfortable. When someone tells me, “Let me prove it to you” in an attempt to convince me of a changed mindset or behavior, I tend to automatically respond, “No, it’s fine.” or “You don’t have to do that.”, when really, YES, I want you to prove it to me. YES, I want to see a change. I am more forgiving when I see a difference in someone that shows they are aware of what went awry and have decided to implement nuanced manners. Although, I also notice when people make no attempts of change. Ultimately, we just want to be happy without having to do too much and when we do too much we can become unhappy because we feel others aren't doing the same or don’t notice all of what we are doing.
On another note, I graduated…again. It’s always a great feeling when you reach a new goal and new level in life and an even greater feeling when people show their love and support for you.
Thank you to all those who reached out to me in celebration. You have no idea what that means to me and how grateful I am. The majority of you don't even know me personally, but have found camaraderie with me through all these many words that sometimes make sense and invoke intrinsic thoughts and other times just…is. — That's what I love about this.
*This is a fallacy. Men don’t do this anymore. They expect you to come find them. They have unlearned all the great things of chivalry and dominance and have learned to behave more like women. I thought men were supposed to be the strong confident ones who pursue a woman. But I guess there are so many women who make easy for men to do so little that they don’t feel they should make much of an effort. -- That’s not a man for me.
