Self-Esteem

A few readers sent comments in:

There's no such thing as an Uber? Was he her only friend? A man taking the same girl home each time something is going on.

Just like no response is a response, not answering is also an answer. Girl, he was fckn her.

Sis, I don’t even take my platonic friends home like that. Trust your intuition. She want him and he want her. The men who only be around girls that be all over them are suspect. Hoes are thirsty and men love that shit.

— This is in response about the guy who had the girl all over him and skipped around the answer when I questioned if there was something between them. 😏

How is it that I never met you but I still know when you're not being serious about something. Damn are your friends really your friends?

— Lol. Not all of them understand my jokes. Sometimes I like to say things that make people think outside the box and some of them aren't ready for it. 😆

This topic is going to be a little complex so pay attention.

A few times when I go hang out with my guy friends I have a quirky way of asking if there is going to be another woman with them by asking, "Are you with someone because I want to know where my self-esteem needs to be." 😆 Now, let's be clear, I do not have self-esteem issues, I'm great, but I also know I'm not everyone's cup of tea 😉. So I like to know what I'm walking into when I do go hang out with my friends and there’s another woman with them:

  • Is she just another friend

  • Is she someone you're interested in

  • Is she someone you have history with

  • Is she someone who's trying to be with you

Because vibes are different depending on the relationship you have with someone and people can pick up on it. There was one time a guy I know walked into the same place I was at with 2 girls. He didn’t know I was going to be there and I know one of the girls too and she was all over him all night. Touching on him and everytime he got up to move, she followed behind him like they were together. And when I asked the guy if they were fooling around he skipped around the question. I've kind of always speculated something between them for a while because many other times he'd always make a point to take her home. Ladies, men like this are full of shit, and Fellas, if you don’t agree, change my mind. Anyways I never want to walk in a place and make others feel uncomfortable with me being around or feel like my presence is not welcomed by others.

If I'm out with friends, I going to make sure I give everyone equal attention and engage with everyone. Self-esteem is all about what you feel about yourself and I notice signs of low self-esteem when people say certain things or their body language shifts a certain way, it points to insecurity issues.

I've been in situations with women not appreciating me being around because of a guy they like, so they would make it a point to stay close to him and have quiet conversations with him. And my thoughts are, if you were sure about yourself and about him, you wouldn't be acting like that. And guys, this may be over your heads because most of you aren't paying attention, but instead just see it as a women wanting to be next to you. 🙄

Fellas, like who you like, but if you're one of my friends and there's a woman who always seems to act a little different when other woman is around, then she really doesn't need to be out with us. Because women can get very vindictive and as pleasant as I am, I'm only going to put up with so many whispers and side eyes before I end up telling you something that's going to hurt your feelings.

And fellas, if you’re not faciliting the welcomes with everyone, it can be very uncomfortable, so I appreciate getting a heads up about people before hand. So just be mindful the next time you're introducing women to each other.