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The last post we talked about sex. Let’s go a little deeper (no pun intended for you freaks 😆). Let’s talk about the relationship you have with your partner and what makes a woman comfortable. I was afraid to do a survey on this topic because I’m still scarred from the last survey!
With everything you ladies gave me in your comments and stories, you like for a man you be about you. Even if on occasion you allow other people into your bedroom or you have an “open understanding relationship”, you still like to feel he still only chooses you at the end of the day. I get it, you guys are a unit, a union, a team, so it’s the two of you against everyone else. But with so many outside influences, how do you trust that a man isn’t being swayed towards something that does not involve you at all? Granted couples are still two separate individuals, so there are still things that you may do or decide without your partner’s input, and everyone’s relationship works differently, BUT at what point is what you do or decide to do go against any love and trust your relationship has?
If I am with someone, everyone else is for our entertainment and we are the ones who see eye to eye, we are the ones who look out for each other before we look out for anyone else. If we are at a social event, we don’t have to stand next to each other the whole time, but come around and check on me. If we are in the same room, I can look over at you anytime and you can look over at me, so I should not see any woman getting too cozy with you or touching on you like how I would. It’s not a matter of wanting control, it’s a matter of respecting each other and our bond or connection. Yes, there will be men who vie for me as their will be women who vie for him, but how we respond to those advances is very important in how the relationship is set. And if we are not public about our situation, don’t go on telling people there's nothing going on or there's no feelings between us, because then you are already setting things up to fall apart. People don’t have to know our business, but at the very least they should know that you're eyes are on me. And if a man feels he can’t do that, then he should be very honest about it.
I saw a post that read, “A man settles where he finds peace.” And I thought…Well, he needs to also offer peace and to do that he has to know what she finds peaceful. But if it’s only about him, then a man settles where it’s easy and that statement is misogynistic. Reminds me of the professional athlete I used to date when I was younger, gorgeous man, but a very selfish, narcissistic, and a bad attitude. — Also, what does a man consider peace? Not being mentally challenged? Not being questioned about his thoughts or emotions? Not being encouraged to live healthier? If a man considers peace to not be bothered when someone wants to better understand him, his actions, his moods, and wants him to be better, then he doesn't want growth, he wants contentment. And I’m too ambitious to be content, I want abundance.
Boys will be boys, even when they become men and carry and abundance of responsibilities, they are still boys. They like when pretty girls give them attention, it feeds their egos. They like knowing that they are attractive to women, it feeds their pride. But what sets men apart from reckless boys is DISCIPLINE.
The discipline of knowing he has someone who cares for him and who would be hurt if he did something to tarnish the relationship. The discipline of talking to the person he is with if something is on his mind. The discipline to learn his partner and know what she is comfortable with and what she isn’t. A progressive man knows discipline, especially if there are other women who want him. He doesn’t allow another woman to get too comfortable with him or confuse his pleasantness to be something more. He makes his boundaries very clear to other women.
This is the difference between a man playing games and a man who wants you. A man playing games either doesn’t know what he wants or he just wants what he wants from multiple people without being clear that he is not committing to one person. A man who wants you won’t make things confusing. You will know exactly where you stand with him and he’ll keep reassuring you that he’s not looking elsewhere. — That is an attractive man.
And here's is a PSA to all men, regardless if you call it dating, or seeing each other, or just being casual, what you do with a woman in private is still a type a relationship you need to be aware of, whether maintaining and growing it, or avoiding and destroying it. It is still something you consciously developed with her. — Be very mindful of that. Emotionally intelligent men are.
Listen, I'm not saying men who share their 🍆 around are bad men, trust me I have a few friends who are male whores (😒) and I accept them for how they want to be, but those type of men aren’t for me or women of a particular standard. If you have community 🍆 , good for you. That's just not my vibe. I think men who are low key and laid back are more my speed. I may have this website where I talk about many topics, but my personal life is still sacred and I like for a man to have the same sentiment; supports what I do but also trusts that I’m not allowing people in to damage our relationship.
