“Don’t be sneaky with how you feel. That’s a sucker move.”

You all just deboed my topics! I had another one ready to go, but now I’ve deivated a little. If any of you want to share your thoughts on anything, you can always send me a message. You are not required to share you name, your email, or any contact information. Nothing ties back to you if you want to remain anonymous. I have a lot of readers like that and I have some that share their names and emails because you want direct responses from me and I do not mind that either. I’m not here to just impose my ideas onto you. Like I said, there’s no guide book to life or how to navigate your connection, communication, or relationships with people. We let the Universe do what it does and make sure we take accountability just as much as we may try to blame others.

You guys gave me much feedback from the Situationship topic, and give me some more insight on Sneaky Links, I figured I go through that since it’s not my area of expertise and these are all fairly new terms because thrown around a lot lately. So I’m just going to share your thoughts on Sneaky Links. For the most part, you all say that Sneaky Links are JUST SEX. Not thing else. You say a Sneaky Link can become a Situationship and further become a relationship, but not the other way around. Like a Relationship can never become a Sneaky Link. Is this 100% accurate?

But my major question is, how do you not let a Sneaky Link get too far? In my opinion, sex can be very intimate and can cause unexpected emotions for each other? Is it realistic to disconnect certain human elements from sex? So if it’s just sex, that mean you two are not hanging out, you’re not making meaningful conversations, you’re not meeting friends or family, all you are doing is calling or sending a text message when you’re in the mood. Am I on the right track here?

Let me explore this outloud. Say I get myself into a Sneaky Link situation, how do I even make it clear that that’s what it is? Like do we plan to be at the same place, not acknowledge we know each other, but leave at the same time? Are we legit friends? Or is that not even important? Say if I’m at a bar and my Sneaky Link is also there, do I shoot him a text to let him know when I’m leaving? Or what if he is with someone? Do I still make some form of contact or do I assume nothing is happening that evening with him? I need to know these parameters! Where is the line drawn?

Or let’s say I have a long time friend, we do not speak to each other often or see each other often and we happen to run into each other. And say we’ve always had an attraction for each other but never acted on it and on the day we run into each other, we slip off to a hotel room. Everything with our friendship has always be good, so we don’t want to make this a routine thing and we don’t want to ruin our friendship, so we have an unspoken agreement that we just hookup if we run into each other and if we are both available. Am I sort of getting the picture?

I cannot say I see myself doing this, but I also won’t say that I’ll never consider it. First and foremost I have to be comfortable enough with the person to even entertain the thought of sex, as far as the dynamic of our relationship in regards to how well we do or do not know each other and the factors that may be affected, I guess a Sneaky Link would be unique to you and the other person. But then again, isn’t that the case with any form of relationship? Whether its a Sneaky Link, a Situationship, or an established Relationship, isn’t all of it unique to the people that’s in it?

I think at this point in my life, I don’t much care what the label is, I care more about how I’m treated. Be clear with me. Let me know what you want and what you don’t want and most importantly, let me know if any of that changes. Don’t have me thinking something is a certain way, but you change your mind and not tell me, so then I start to pick up on weird vibes because you didn’t know how to use your language skills. C’mon now, don’t be a chump. I think the biggest issue that two people can have is not communicating exactly what you feel, what you want, and what’s changed.

I’m going to give this topic a day or two to allow any additional feedback, then we’re moving on to the next subject.

Be safe everyone.