“Don't Take Away What I’ve Accomplished Just Because I Didn't Talk About The Work I Put Into It.”

How are you with your finances? Are you in debt? Do you always need a co-signer? How’s that credit score? As some of you may know, I am in a doctoral program which I only have 1 more year left. My research topic has just been approved by the IRB (Institutional Review Board). My topic is: “The Impact of Financial Literacy for High School Students”. I am going to explore previous research on this topic in conjunction to getting feedback from people and their views of financials literacy and what they think should be taught to high school students. If you would like to be a participant in my research you will only need to answer 18 questions. If you don’t feel comfortable with certain questions, you can skip it. Plus, it is 100% anonymous (you know I like to protect your privacy just as much as my own). Participate HERE.

I am passionate about this topic because growing up there were not many courses or classes that offered financial learning, and if there were, it was an elective. I believe everyone needs to undergo a robust financial literacy course before graduating high school. I don’t know if you believe this, but money goes a long way and having good credit takes you further. You don’t want to be one of those people who can’t pay your rent because you decided to have a fun weekend. Or your lights got cut off because you spent that money on a VIP section. Let’s be better than that, and I’m really taking to the kids who like to show out with no backup income or not enough in savings. You have to understand that living within your means is crucial to money management. And if you want more, than do more. I don’t mean to sound off tone, but there’s plenty of opportunities to make the money you need or want to make, you just have to go after it. If you see me out having a cocktail during the week, it’s because I put in 10-12 hours worth of work already.

One of the BIGGEST MISCONCEPTIONS PEOPLE HAVE OF ME is that my life is easy or that everything was handed it me. I HATE THAT! 😖 Someone actually said to me that I was “born with a silver spoon” — ☹️ It hurt to hear that because this person knew me for a long time, which means they never really paid attention to my drive and hard work. LISTEN, just because I don’t talk about my struggles or tell people the steps I’m taking to reach a goal doesn’t mean that what you see was just handed to me. Just because I make it look simple and I don’t complain, doesn’t mean I didn’t go through obstacles. My father wasn’t a CEO or an Executive, nor did he own businesses. What he did do was obtained valuable skills that allowed him to make a good living to provide his family with a good life. I adopted those traits from him and want to do the same for my kids. Don’t ever think I was given any freebies in life.

That person who said that may deal with people who depend on them or deal with people with their hands out, I surely never had my hand out to this person, nor did I ever expect extravagant things from them. As a matter of fact, I always tried to make sure I contributed something anytime it seemed appropriate. So to hear that they think I was born with a silver spoon really rubbed me the wrong way. Maybe some men want to hear women complain about money so they can be their savior. Or how about when some men assume women are golddiggers when they barely have any gold to give. Aye fam, I am the gold, there’s no digging over here ✨️. If a man wants to do for me, that’s his choice, but I don’t expect anyone to provide for me except me. I learned to be good with money through experiences and trial and error. I wish I had a required Financial Literacy program in high school that taught me:

1. Budgeting and saving.

2. Understanding credit and debt management.

3. Investment basics.

4. Financial planning and goal setting.

5. Consumer rights and responsibilities.

I didn’t really learn about stocks until 2020 and I’ve become good at it. Had I learned sooner, I have no doubt my portfolio would be triple what it’s worth right now. I’m saying all this to say, learning about money early on can really help you long term, it can help you when making big purchase like a house, or even help you manage your money when allocating for vacations, buying a new car, or getting an investment property. The major thing is you want to keep your debt to income ratio very low and the sooner you are able to learn that, the more equip you will be when making decisions like that.

And the other reason for saying all this is to affirm that you cannot just look at someone and assume they have it easy. Don’t take my hard work away from me. No one earned me degrees for me. No one learned my skills for me. No one gave me a network of people to elevate with. I did all that on my own. So again, don’t take away someone’s accomplishments just because you see how well they are doing. Just because you weren't shooting with me at the gym, doesn’t mean I wasn't practicing. (You see how I put a twist in that? Some of you get. 😁)

And this last point I want to bring up is people thinking that you are “obligated” to help them when they're in need. I struggle with this at times with people close to me. They see that I'm doing well and want me to freely share my benefits. Here’s the thing, if my father, my kids, or my siblings need something, I don't hesitate as long as it's not frivolous and generally we're equally there for each other. But there's some relationships that leans more on me. I don’t mind making contributions or supporting a positive initiative, but don’t make it a belief that I owe you a part of what I've been able to do. I don't like that.

If you are a fully capable adult, your personal responsibilities, your living choices, or your consequences should not fall on to my expense, especially when I know I can't call on you for the same things (although, parents, our elderly, and kids who are still in school are an exception). When I give to charities or non-profits, I’m giving back to under-served people. When I support causes, I'm supporting it because someone I care about is part of it or it will help someone I care about. I don't just give money away. I worked hard for it and you should never let anyone make you feel ashamed for making good financial decisions and living a life that best suits you. Be proud of what you've made of yourself. I know I am.

Be safe everyone.