“I’m not always focused on what happens next, if what’s happening now is making me happy.”

How many of you studied Greek Mythology? There's endless stories about the Gods and Goddesses of Greece.

For instance, the story of Oedipus, his father sent him away when he was born because a prophet told him that his son would overthrow him and take over his kingdom and marry his wife. After Oedipus was grown up a prophet told him that if he wanted to be king then he needed to go to the castle and kill the first person he saw. Well, in the story, when Oedipus is heading to the castle, the guards were there to protect it and when the king realized it was his son that he sent away and regretted doing so, he ran ahead of the guards, but as the prophet stated, Oedipus had to kill the first person he saw, who ended up being the king, and therefore he became the new king and married the queen who ended up being his mother. After learning the truth about who his parents were Oedipus took his own eyes out and lived the rest of his life unable to see. The moral is supposed to be that you cannot control your own destiny, it plays out how it’s supposed to.

In another myth, Sisyphus tries to cheat death and Zeus punishes him by making him push a heavy boulder up the hill and if he pushes it over the hill, Sisyphus is free, but something always happens to the rock when it reached the top of the hill and it rolls back down to the bottom. So in this story, Sisyphus created his own destiny by trying to trick or deceive people.

This is not to say we do not have free-will. We are still able to make our own choices, but our decisions determine how may lessons we will learn along the way. We will aways get from point A to point B, but the unknown variable is what happens in that journey between the two points. And once we reach point B, the next marker in our destiny is point C. But let’s put all this into perspective. Let’s say I was destined to be a doctor of education. My point A is where I began in my studies and my point B is my degree. I’m still on this journey, so how I get from A to B is a combination of big decisions, failures, distractions and so on.

Let’s use my romantic relationships. I could say each man is a point in my life, or let’s use the word chapter in this case. The man I had kids with would probably be the most complex chapter due to the fact I was at an age where I was make big adult decisions before I was mentally ready to. And my previous lovers they would be different points or chapters of my life, and the decisions I made determined how I met them and what type of dynamic relationship I had with them. And if we are relying on destiny, I was always going to meet them, I just didn’t know how or when and the things that happen between me and them is what wasn’t set in stone.

The big lesson here is that you have to take life as is comes, because it’s coming regardless, and whether or not you believe in destiny, the things you do based on the choices you make are what’s going to determine if whether you need more time at your current point, or if you’ve already learned and grown enough at this step to move on to the next step. I know I am speaking in a lot of metaphors and philosophies and I am not saying to think of this my way. The points in your life may be different, or your chapters may have different categories. I encourage you to digest all of this in a fashion where you ask yourself:

• With everything I am doing right now, where am I still struggling or where am I stuck?

• Do I keep getting into the same types of relationships?

• Do the people I care about know that I care about them?

• Am I mistreating anyone?

• Am I asking for what I want?

• Am I equipped to handle what I want?

• Do I keep my word?

• Do I really forgive or do I still hold grudges?

• Am I healed or am I still holding on to the past?

• Am I learning from my setbacks?

• Am I aware when I am being vulnerable?

• Are my vulnerabilities welcoming positive change or stress?

• Can I go to sleep tonight knowing I did my best to be a good person?

Again, I’m not telling you to think like me, come up with your own values of life and what everything means to you. I do not know if I fully believe in destiny, but at times when I am struggling, believing in destiny keeps my mind hopeful. However I do believe in the idea that everything happens for a reason, even if I don’t understand the reason and maybe things happening for a reason is part of our destiny.

Be safe everyone.